Is Sex Good for Menopause?

Hot flashes, mood swings, restless nights spent tossing and turning. These are the visions most women conjure when they hear the word menopause.

Here’s what we DON’T usually link to menopause: a great sex life! And that’s too bad, because research shows that intimate sessions with your partner might offer just the symptomatic relief you need. In this post we’ll look at:

• The physical challenges of menopause
  
• Interventions that can help
  
• How hormonal changes affect your sex drive
  
• Physical benefits of menopause sex
  
• Emotional benefits of menopause sex
  
• 3 tips for better sex during menopause

The many challenges of menopause

The big physical change that happens during menopause is loss of estrogen.¹ That matters because estrogen plays a critical role in a woman’s sexual function and libido. As estrogen declines, many women experience less interest in sex and physical changes that make intimacy less enjoyable.

One of those changes is vaginal dryness,¹ a normal result of estrogen loss. Sadly, when delicate vaginal tissue gets dry, the friction during sex can quickly become painful.

Less estrogen also causes decreased blood flow down under, making it harder to even get aroused.

Interventions that can help

If you want a natural approach, try eating more foods that boost estrogen production. You want to look for foods that contain phytoestrogens.² Think olive oil, avocados, soy, and soy products. Consuming around 50 mg daily can help, especially if you add dark leafy-green vegetables to your diet – because they help your body recognize phytoestrogens as estrogen and digest them.

If you’d prefer higher level medical intervention, consider hormone replacement therapy (HRT). Board-certified OB/GYN Dr. Mary Claire Haver is the author of The New Menopause, and she supports the use of HRT.³ Her NYT Bestseller outlines science-backed strategies for dealing with changes in appearance, sleep patterns, physical and mental well-being, and sexual issues. So maybe talk with your doctor about whether HRT is right for you.

How hormonal changes affect your sex drive

A dry and irritated vagina isn’t the only unpleasant side effect of estrogen loss. Menopausal hormone changes also can dampen your sexual desire and make arousal more difficult. Here’s why.

• Decreased blood flow. Estrogen regulates blood flow to your clitoris and vagina. Lower estrogen levels can lead to decreased blood flow to these areas, reducing sensitivity and desire.
  
• Changes in brain chemistry. Estrogen isn’t the only way to stimulate your nether regions. Your brain can help, too, because it’s home to estrogen receptors that activate sexual arousal. Less estrogen alters the production of dopamine and serotonin. As they diminish so does desire and pleasure.
  
• Mood changes. Fluctuations in estrogen also affect your mood, contributing to irritability, anxiety, and even depression. It’s pretty hard to get all sexy when your emotions are a mess.

Luckily, one research review⁴ published in the Canadian Medical Association Journal found that women who used HRT experienced an increase in their libidos and sexual responsiveness. So, again, it may be worth investigating.

The physical benefits of menopause sex

Remember the old adage, use it or lose it? That’s how libido works during menopause. Regular sexual activity provides the support you need to navigate some of your worst symptoms.

Beyond symptom relief, intimacy and orgasm stimulate increased blood flow, the release of endorphins, and pelvic floor muscle contractions – all of which enhance your overall physical well-being. Here are two other important benefits linked to sex during midlife.

Improved vaginal lubrication and elasticity. Dryness and irritation are common complaints during menopause. Increased blood flow to the pelvic region combats dryness and improves the health of vaginal tissue.

Increase pelvic muscle tone. A research study⁵ published in the International Urogynecology Journal finds that sexually-active women have significantly stronger pelvic floor muscles compared to those who are not sexually active. When you’re aroused you experience an increase in muscle tension in your pelvic area, giving those muscles a natural workout.

BTW: Orgasm contracts all of those same pelvic muscles. To a lesser degree, so do Kegel ⁶ exercises. So go for the gold, girls! And regular Kegels are good, too.

The emotional benefits of menopause sex

Plenty of research has examined the physical changes of menopause; but its emotional impact is often overlooked. Enjoying a satisfying sex life can boost your mood and provide other emotional and psychological advantages.

Stress relief and improved mood. Science⁷ validates that sex boosts your mood and relieves anxiety. Two key players are dopamine and endorphins. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that contributes to your brain’s reward and pleasure centers. When dopamine levels increase (which they do during sex), you feel more relaxed and satisfied. Meanwhile, endorphins are natural painkillers and mood regulators.

They’re released during arousal and orgasm, which helps explain the euphoric and relaxed feeling that often follows intimate encounters.

More self-esteem and better body image. Many women struggle with these issues at all stages of life. Feeling a loss of control over your body during menopause can make things worse. What’s more, some of the physical changes that happen during menopause – loss of breast fullness, skin changes, weight gain – can undermine your confidence. Regular sex with your partner can help by making you feel desired and attractive.

A stronger intimate connection with your partner. Sexual desire and emotional attachment are two different things. However, a team of psychologists from the Interdisciplinary Center Herzliya and the Department of Clinical and Social Sciences in Psychology at the University of Rochester determined that the more intimate you are with your partner, the more you strengthen your emotional connection with him/her/them⁸ .

Make it simple with 3 essential tips for better sex during menopause

Communicate with your partner. Honest and open dialogue is key to addressing any sexual challenges you experience during menopause. Open up about the physical or emotional changes you’re going through. Let your needs and desires be known. Then work together to find solutions that make sex better for both of you.

Use a sexual lubricant. A good feminine lubricant is essential if vaginal dryness is keeping you from initiating or enjoying sex. Not all vaginal lubricants are created equally. Avoid anything that contains alcohol, parabens, propylene glycol, or silicone because those ingredients can actually worsen dryness. Crème de la Femme is our FDA-cleared vaginal lubricant. It contains no harsh ingredients. Safely use it as often as you like, for hours of silky-sheer comfort.

Experiment with new positions. Keeping sex fun and comfortable in menopause isn’t just about combatting dryness. It’s also about finding the right position to maximize your pleasure. If you have pain deep in the vagina, a “you sit on top” position is your best bet for relieving discomfort because you control the level of penetration. If you prefer to face your partner in a missionary position, try putting a pillow under your lower back to raise your pelvis.

Breeze Through Menopause Between the Sheets

Lean into the change, ladies. Embracing your matured sexuality is one of the most affirming and gratifying steps you can take as you make your way through this stage in your life journey.

Shari Berg is a researcher, frequent blogger, feature writer, and author of Wars End with Me.

 

Sources

1. Understanding Estrogen Action During Menopause. ncbi.nlm.nih.gov. Accessed May 16, 2024.
2. Phytoestrogens and Health Effects. ncbi.nlm.nih.gov. Accessed April 10, 2026.
3. The ABCs of Hormone Therapy. thepauselife.com. Accessed April 10, 2026.
4. A pragmatic approach to the management of menopause. cmaj.ca. Accessed April 10, 2026.
5. A strong pelvic floor is associated with higher rates of sexual activity in women with pelvic floor disorders. ncbi.nlm.nih.gov. Accessed April 10, 2026.
6. Kegel exercises: A how-to guide for women. mayoclinic.org. Accessed April 10, 2026.
7. How Dopamine Influences Your Mental Health. verywellmind.com. Accessed April 10, 2026.
8. Cut to the chase: Can sex help start a relationship? rochester.edu. Accessed April 10, 2026.